Decidedly With Mistletoe Page 4

  “Would you like me to sign your book for you?” Ava asked.

  “Oh gosh, would I!” the girl practically squealed. “Mandy’s never going to believe I met you. She’s my best friend, and she’s read the book almost as many times as I have. She’s already read Max Thunder and the Helm of Darkness because it was her birthday last week and she got the book as a present. She’s sooo lucky.” The words poured from her mouth in a tsunami-strength rush.

  Ava searched through her purse and pulled out a pen. A minute later, the book was signed, and Ava was answering a barrage of questions about the series and the characters. Ava smiled and replied to each one with a level of excitement that matched the girl’s.

  And damned if a new wave of pride didn’t almost knock me on my ass at what Ava had accomplished. She’d always had an active imagination. She used to write short stories, even before we were engaged. But she never showed them to me. She never showed them to anyone.

  Eventually, the questions came to an end—mostly thanks to Harold and Betsy. “Santa and I are thankful you could all join us tonight. And since we’ll be busy tomorrow night, on Christmas Eve, we thought now would be a good time for Christmas caroling.”

  Next to me, Ava stiffened and shuffled back a small step as if trying not to be noticed. On instinct, I reached back and knotted my fingers with hers. And like when I kissed her, my body felt as if it had become electrically charged.

  I guess some things never change.

  Betsy handed out the lyrics, then she and Harold began singing the first song: “O Christmas Tree.”

  The rest of the guests started singing along with them, including me. I glanced at Ava and smirked. I leaned into her, so only she could hear me. “You’re lip-synching, aren’t you?”

  That’s right—Ava’s tone deaf.

  She smirked back and gave a tiny nod. I squeezed her hand, letting her know her secret was safe with me.

  Santa and Mrs. Claus ended the singing after eight songs, with the promise that Santa had something for all the good little boys and girls.

  Which gave me an idea. “Why don’t you go up to our room?” I told Ava. “I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

  Once she was walking up the stairs, I joined Harold in the dining area. “Is it possible for me to purchase a bottle of red wine to take upstairs?”

  He gave a merry chuckle from deep in his belly—exactly how I imagined Santa would do…if he were real. “That sounds like a wonderful idea.” He went behind the bar, bent down, and popped up a moment later with a bottle of red. He handed it to me, along with two wineglasses.

  I thanked him and returned to Ava’s and my room.

  She was gazing out the window at the falling snow when I entered. The gas fireplace had already been turned on.

  I let the door click shut behind me and stepped farther inside. That was when I noticed the pillows and blanket on the floor by the wall.

  “I figured I could sleep there tonight,” Ava said, now facing me.

  “You can sleep on the bed with me. I really don’t mind. I mean, unless you think you might attack me in my sleep.” I winked at her.

  “No, it’s just…I prefer to sleep on the floor.”

  “Really? So you don’t actually have a bed at home? You sleep on the floor?”

  The cute blush from earlier returned to her cheeks. “Well, no. But I figured since we aren’t actually dating, I should sleep on the floor.”

  The laugh that I’d kept under wraps when she first suggested this erupted from my lungs. “We were sleeping together even before we were engaged, Ava. Is this ‘no sleeping with a man unless I have a wedding band on my finger’ a new rule of yours?”

  She scowled. “Well, no. But as you pointed out, we were engaged. We aren’t now. We’re not even dating.”

  “Okay, if you’re so adamant about us not sharing a bed, then I’ll take the floor.”

  The scowl was joined by the crossing of her arms. “Why? Because you’re a man and you think I’m too much of a princess to sleep on the floor?”

  I laughed again. “Sweetheart, I definitely don’t think of you as a princess.” Even if her family did think of themselves as royalty more times than not. “But in case you’ve forgotten, I used to be with the SEALs. I’m used to sleeping in locations and conditions that you fortunately never have to consider. If you’re so damn determined that we won’t be sharing the bed tonight, then I insist on being the one on the floor.”

  I walked over to the love seat in front of the fireplace and placed the wine and glasses on the small coffee table. “I thought we could continue catching up on what’s been going on in our lives since we last saw each other.”

  She shrugged. “Sure. Okay.”

  I picked up a wineglass and filled it. “For starters, all I know is that you were headed for Lake Tahoe, but you haven’t told me yet why you were heading there two days before Christmas and alone.” She had mentioned during dinner that she was driving to Lake Tahoe when she got the flat, but after that, she changed the direction of our conversation.

  I handed her the glass of wine and she sat down.

  “Today was the last day of classes, and because it was early dismissal, I decided to book the resort for tonight instead of driving there tomorrow morning. I figured it would give me an extra day there.”

  My own glass now filled, I sat beside her and turned to her. “Are you meeting your family there?”

  She looked away, settling her gaze on the fire, and shook her head. “No. My parents and grandparents chose to spend Christmas in the Bahamas.”

  I frowned. “And you weren’t invited?”

  She laughed, but the sound was filled with a sadness that I wasn’t used to hearing with her laugh. It had always been filled with love and hope and joy. “No, I was invited. In fact, my grandmother phoned this afternoon, demanding I join them. She had even purchased a ticket for me so that, in her mind, I couldn’t say no.”

  “But considering you were driving to Lake Tahoe instead of San Francisco airport, I’m going out on a limb here and guessing you weren’t planning to join your family, despite what your grandmother wants?” Ten years ago, I would never have expected Ava to go against her family’s demands. She usually did whatever they asked of her, just to make them happy.

  She was always trying to make them happy.

  That was another reason why I had walked away from her in the end. At the time, I had believed that she would never be her own person. She would always be who her family wanted her to be. And I knew eventually, if we had gotten married, our marriage would have struggled to survive.

  “They figured my attendance would go a long way toward repairing the damage I caused.…” She took a long sip of her wine.

  “Damage? What did you do…break a family heirloom?”

  She smiled…only this time, it sparkled with life and amusement. “Not exactly. You know how in the olden days, kings would marry off their sons or daughters to other princes or princesses, with hopes of aligning the two kingdoms to benefit both?”

  “Not really. What does this have to do with you and your family and the damage you supposedly caused?”

  “They wanted me to marry Chris to align my family with his, so to speak. Both felt this was a great first step to a partnership between my family’s law firm and Chris’s family business. Don’t ask me to explain. I never understood it. Besides, I was only interested in marrying for love.

  “So as you can imagine, when I divorced him, neither family was happy with me.”

  “Even though he was the one who cheated on you?”

  “My grandmother and his mother took me aside and told me I should have looked the other way at his dalliances. Love was just a wasted concept, supported by makers of fine chocolate and greeting card companies. People in my family’s position didn’t have time for such silliness.” She gave another shrug. “Apparently, I was just being silly for wanting to be loved. Apparently, she forgot that my parents were in love and still
are.”

  My heart tightened at the part about wanting to be loved. Before I realized what I was doing, I leaned down and kissed the top of her head. “Not silly at all. You deserve to be loved.”

  She turned her gaze back to mine and gave me a sad laugh. “Now if only the guys I tend to fall for felt the same way. I’m the girl that men love and then leave…if they really even loved me to begin with.” She took a long sip of her wine.

  I wanted to point out that what she had said wasn’t entirely true. I’d left her because I had loved her. But something warned me that she wouldn’t believe me. And why would she? I’d done a great job convincing her that I had no longer loved her.

  “So do you still hike?” I asked, just to change topic.

  Her face brightened. “I do. Not as much as I used to. Mostly because my best friend has a family now and doesn’t have time to hike with me. But I am saving up to one day go down to Machu Picchu in Peru and hike there. Plus, I’m contemplating a new middle-grade series based on Inca mythology, and it would be great to just go there and get a feel for the place.”

  The words rushed from her mouth so fast, I wasn’t sure if she had taken a breath the entire time.

  But that wasn’t the part that had me frowning. It was the part where she’d said that she was saving up to one day go there that had me confused. The Ava I remembered had plenty of money to go on these adventures—and to travel first class. She never had to save up money to do that.

  The image of her older model Honda Civic flashed in my mind. The jeans and sweater she was wearing also didn’t resemble what I remembered as her typical style. When we were dating, her outfits had been from high-end designers. “Off-the-rack” was a concept her family abhorred. The outfit she now had on was obviously off-the-rack and not exactly new.

  “You have to save to go to Peru?” I asked. “Aren’t you allowed to use your trust fund for that?” Which made no sense…pretty much like her clothing. Traveling to exotic locales was also on the agenda back in the days. Maybe Peru wasn’t considered exotic enough for her family.

  Ava flashed me a soft smile. “I have no idea. But since I walked away from my trust fund back in college, it’s not something I’ve given any thought to.”

  “You walked away from it? How does that even work?” It wasn’t as if I knew anything about trust funds.

  She nodded. “That’s right. My grandmother gave me a choice. Follow in the family footsteps and become a lawyer, or forfeit the right to my trust fund. I wanted to be a teacher. I didn’t want to be a lawyer. Money and power aren’t important to me…not like they are for my family, not like they are for some people I know.” The pain in her eyes stared back at me, and for once I felt like I was missing something—like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle.

  But while she might have been staring at me with pain in her eyes, I was gaping at her, dumbfounded. I’d underestimated Ava. I’d underestimated what had been important to her.

  “How come you never told me that you wanted to be a teacher?” I asked. Would I have walked away from her ten years ago if I had known? Never. Especially if I had known that she would’ve rather turned her back on her trust fund and become a teacher than keep her old lifestyle.

  “I don’t know. I think for the longest time I was afraid to admit it even to myself, just because I didn’t think I had a choice. It had been hammered into my head from a young age that I would become a lawyer…and maybe one day run for office. I didn’t realize that I could just walk away from the life that didn’t hold much appeal to me and set out on my own path.”

  I smiled. “I’m glad you finally realized that. Something tells me you’re an amazing teacher. And if you ever need someone to go hiking with, you can call me.” I genuinely meant it. Back when we were dating, we used to hike whenever we could. I missed it—and not just because hiking sex was pretty damn awesome.

  But that wasn’t the only reason for my offer. It came with an ulterior motive. Ten years ago, I made the biggest mistake of my life and walked away from the girl I’d loved, because I thought I was doing the right thing. And now? Now I wanted to see if it was possible to have a second chance with her. I wanted to find out if we could be a couple again like before—or if going our separate ways had been the right thing to do after all.

  But to do that, I needed to regain Ava’s trust.…

  5

  AVA

  LATER, if someone was to interrogate me and ask me what my goal for tonight was, I would’ve told them it was to spend the evening with Liam.

  Because then I could prove to the mistletoe that he was not my Forever Love. He’d already had that chance ten years ago and broke off our engagement instead.

  Right—the mistletoe didn’t care one way or another about Zoe’s family legend when it came to finding true love. But it was the principle of it that mattered. My body was confusing Forever Love with a good fuck.

  A very good fuck, if I remembered correctly.

  One I wouldn’t have minded experiencing again. As a one-night stand.

  Nothing more.

  My gaze dropped to Liam’s mouth, and I unconsciously ran the tip of my tongue against my lower lip, remembering the taste of him. Craving to relive it for old times’ sake.

  Yes, I realized that this was the same guy who had broken my heart when he told me he no longer loved me—and was paid handsomely for doing so.

  But that was ten years ago. I had long since moved on. Plus, his actions had given me the strength to walk away from my family’s wealth and their desire for power.

  Maybe that was why I was considering kissing him again. As a thank-you.

  If he was interested.

  The added bonus was that we could still keep to our ground rule of not discussing the end of our engagement. That was in the past, and this was just making out.

  My eyes moved away from his lips, up to his heated gaze. “I know we’re not dating—and after tonight we’ll go our separate ways—but if you’re okay with it, I’d like to kiss you again.”

  Right—with pick-up lines like that, it was a good thing I wrote middle-grade stories and not romances.

  “Are you sure? I know you don’t want to talk about what happened—”

  I didn’t let him finish that sentence. I placed my finger against his lips. “I haven’t kissed a guy in a long time. A very long time. I just want to make sure I haven’t lost my touch. Or gotten rusty.”

  Wow. I really sucked at seducing guys.

  Clearly I needed more practice.

  Starting with Liam.

  “I mean, if you’re not interested,” I said, “you just have to tell me. I’ll understand. It’s just…I had a crappy day what with my car getting a flat, and I’m not at the resort like I was supposed to be. So I’d really like to—”

  This time it was I who didn’t get to finish the sentence. He lowered his head, and his lips brushed against mine.

  And in that instant, I became drunk on the intoxicating taste of the wine on his breath, from his woodsy scent that always did me in, and from the combination of pheromones and testosterone that were all male, all Liam.

  A familiar need buzzed impatiently through my body like a hive of bees waiting for daylight to come. You know you want it, the pesky, sex-starved voice in my head said. Just take what you need, and then you can walk away.

  You know what they say about famous last words, right? Run.

  Or at least that was what my head was saying. My body—more specifically, my legs—had a different opinion. Just one time, it whispered. What could it hurt to have sex with Liam just one more time?

  My body had a point. What if I didn’t end up having sex with a guy at the resort? It wasn’t like I planned to throw myself at every single man I met there. What if I changed my mind because I wasn’t exactly into one-night stands? Then I’d be forced to go through an even lengthier dry spell.

  What was wrong with grabbing a bottle of water in the desert, even when you knew it could be your last one fo
r a very long time?

  And because I was on a roll, selling the benefits of having sex with Liam (assuming he wanted to have sex with me), let’s not forget the major point. Sex with Liam wouldn’t be disappointing.

  I opened my mouth and gently sucked on his lower lip. My fingers knotted in his hair. His wonderfully soft hair that loosely curled around my fingers. The last time I had seen him, his hair had been shaved short.

  “I love your hair like this,” I said against his lips. “It makes you look even hotter.” Oops. Hadn’t meant to say that.

  “It’s a good thing, then, that I’m keeping it this way. Especially if it means having your fingers in it.” He settled his large hands around my waist and pulled me over to straddle his lap. His hard length pressed against my core. We both moaned.

  “Christ, Ava. I want you so badly.” He thrust his hips, driving me closer to the edge that I knew would be rapidly coming once I gave my consent.

  “I want you, too,” I said on another moan. “Just this one time,” I clarified. No point in him thinking that I would be his booty call once I returned to San Francisco.

  His light brown eyes studied me, a fiery intensity burning in them. “Are you sure?”

  “Very sure.”

  And then Grandma’s words and the image of Gloria’s skinny body intruded on my lust-filled moment. I chewed on my lower lip.

  Liam ran his thumb along it, freeing my lip from my teeth. “You don’t look very sure.”

  “I am…it’s just…I’m not a model. I’m not skinny.”

  “That’s good. I’m not into skinny model types.” His thumb shifted down to lightly scrape across a nipple, still hidden under my bra and sweater. It puckered at the sensation, pleading to feel his touch against it, pleading to feel his fingers against my bare skin.

  His hand trailed along the side of my breast and down my ribs, finally settling on my waist. “From where I’m sitting, I’d say you’re perfect.”

  Liam pushed the hem of my sweater up, tracing his fingers against my flesh. I shivered at his touch, shivered at the memory of what it could do to me.